Holding space 

This weekend I visited and revisited a patient who is actively dying, unresponsive. She is young and has young children and a lovely husband. This is beyond difficult. Her body has made itself ready, but her Spirit has not left for reasons only she knows. Her birth family lives in another country so I suggested to the husband to organize a facetime or zoom mtg where everyone could say their goodbyes because we in hospice believe that she can still hear. He called one family member and within an hour they had organized it, and everyone was on board. This brought much needed support to the husband and closure for all those involved. The next day when I visited, he reported it was a beautiful time of sharing for everyone. 

The kids were coping as children do- in their own way. I offered a copy of my book “Little Star” to the husband and explained if he felt it was appropriate to share and if not that was okay too, it is a small gesture on my part. 

The husband plays music with the kids, they have formed a little band and enjoy sharing this. They played me a rendition of “Lady Madonna” on two pianos and drums, it was very sweet. I am sure this will continue after the patient passes as it is wonderfully therapeutic on so many levels. 

I spent time holding space for the husband, for him to say whatever he needed to say. Holding space is a sacred thing, when I do not inject my own self, but just bear witness to another’s needs, validating and supporting them. I can open my heart to compassion and release any need of judgement- it is a gift I have learnt to love and offer. It is why I do this work, nursing is a sideline, the spiritual support and compassionate love I get to practice is as healing to me as I hope it is to others. It fills me with a sense of being part of God’s Love and that indeed is a gift. 

The last moments before I go- I say goodbye to the patient, sending her love telepathically. I then ask if I can give the husband a hug, he holds on for a long time and I can feel the energy of Spirit passing between us, offering him the comfort of connection in a time of his heart break.  

This is why I do this work, but I am learning more, I am learning to connect with Spirit in a way to offer more comfort to those left behind. It is the next logical step in my evolution. But until I am able to bring this forth I will continue to hold space and give hugs.